this gets annoying

One time when I was 8, I peed the bed. That's an embarrassing age, I know. I was just dreaming about going to the bathroom, and I distinctly remember thinking in my dream, "good thing is a dream, and I'll wake up dry." Uh, scratch that. I woke up in a wet, urine mess. I probably cried from shame and embarrassment. My mom handled it well, though.

I also peed my pants in 3rd grade--an embarrassingly inappropriate age as well. I was sitting in class, and my favorite teacher, except for this one day, would not let me go to the bathroom. To her credit, she probably had no idea of the dire circumstance I was in. As I walked back to my seat after her refusal, my bladder just...exploded, I guess. It's funny how the fear of authority was able to override my body's natural demand. I should have run out of class anyway, but as a 3rd grader, I could not even begin to fathom the ramifications of that rebellion. As I realized the social horror of what had just happened, I resorted to my tried and true method of faking sick. Though I was a precocious child, in my rebellious second grade year, I faked a stomach ache every time we had to do math because it was so boring. (Ironically, I became very good at math later on...) I think I used a stomach ache as my excuse for anything: social anxiety, boredom, nightmares, etc. I just put it all under the stomach ache category. Anyway, the stomach ache was all I could think of, and luckily I was allowed to go to the nurse's office. I thought I had gotten away with all of it, but in hindsight, it was probably pretty evident what had happened.

I have had some even more embarrassing bathroom mishaps that I won't even share here, but sufficeth to say that I have anxiety issues when it comes to losing control of my bladder. I have to pee literally five times before I actually fall asleep. It's like a Pavlovian response now when I get ready for bed. It's quite annoying.

Well, there is your blog TMI for the day.

p.s. new haircut photo coming soon!