I may have an ulcer by the end of the day*

I need to prioritize my life better. I tried this weekend, really I did! Maybe I have ADD? For some reason I think that is a legitimate excuse for everyone, except me. I know it's real, but I think that I could mentally out-smart it. Maybe I just need to buckle down and get things done.

Please just let me survive today.

*Contrary to popular belief, stress does not actually cause peptic ulcers. Ulcers are caused by a bacteria in the stomach, and a simple antibiotic will cure them. I was simply being proverbial.

worth it?

I'm not in any gold II classes this semester. Yeah, I can make excuses like "it's a Blackpool year, so there are no gold bar classes and less space and blah blah blah.." But the truth of the matter is that I'm really just not that good. I also can't bump down to gold I because I have classes at those times. (If I wanted to mess around my whole schedule, I could p o s s i b i l y make gold I standard work...if they would let me.) Will anyone notice if I don't take a technique class? I don't know why I go to all the effort to do this. It's certainly not my calling in life. I guess I was hoping to get good enough to possibly help out at Pacific Ballroom one day. They gave me so much...I just wanted to give back something. Should I just drop dance all together? It hurts to ask that, but I might have to be done... I have a major and a minor that are completely unrelated to dance, and I should get a job. Oh the practicality of it all!

Sometimes I just wait to have decisions made for me because I'm too scared of doing the wrong thing.

BLURG

Gahhh. I just took my cell bio test. I even took it on not the last day (which might be a first for this semester...) And I got an even lower score than the first test!!!! I went to four hours of reviews and then studied some more. The TA made it sound so easy. Am I just retarded? If everyone else aced this test, then I really am a failure. At the same time I don't want everyone else to fail as well.

What happened?? Why does nothing work together for my good anymore? I can't even claim nerd status if I can't even perform well in my classes. I know I'm not the beauty of the bunch, but that was never really what I was trying to sell. If I don't have my intelligence and work ethic...

I have nothing.

Why does life hate me?

Was that really necessary???

So I just finished the physics assignment that I was complaining about-oh, say-4 hours ago!!! Really, Dr. Rees, really? I pretty much do every problem, get them wrong, then use the answer to work backwards, and then I get it right on the second try with the new values. (My homework is done on the internet, and we get three tries, but the values will change if you get it wrong, so that way you actually have to do the problem.)

Anyway, now I have to go on to other homework. Lovely.

BUT, I only have one more homework assignment, quiz, and test for that class. And then I will be done with physics foreVER, foreVER, foreVER...(a la Squints from The Sandlot).